Ghosting: Why It Happens, Why It Sucks, and How to Move On

Let’s talk about ghosting. That magical moment where someone you were totally vibing with just poof disappears into thin air, leaving you with questions, frustration, and maybe a little bit of existential dread. Ghosting is one of those modern dating nightmares that, despite being so common, still stings like a bee every time it happens.

Why People Ghost

Here’s the thing—ghosting happens for all kinds of reasons. Sometimes it’s because people just don’t know how to communicate like adults. Maybe they got overwhelmed, maybe they felt a spark fade, or maybe they’re terrified of commitment and ran the other way. Maybe it’s all of the above!

But, come on, let’s be real. Most of the time, ghosting is just plain cowardice. It’s the easy way out for people who don’t want to have that “I’m just not feeling it” conversation. Instead of putting on their big-kid pants and being honest, they take the path of least resistance…which happens to involve blocking you on all platforms without a single warning. Classic.

Why Ghosting Sucks (A LOT)

Ghosting messes with your head in ways that can be seriously damaging, and we’re not just talking about your self-esteem. When someone ghosts you, it feels personal. You’re left analyzing every single interaction: Did I say something weird? Did they find someone else? Was it because I used too many exclamation marks in my last text?

This whole disappearing act can lead to a nasty spiral of self-blame. But, newsflash: it’s not about you! Nine times out of ten, ghosting is a reflection of the ghoster’s issues, not yours. They’re the ones who couldn’t handle the discomfort of being honest. And yet, you’re the one left picking up the emotional pieces.

The Rage and the Roller Coaster

Now, let’s talk about that lovely cocktail of anger and disappointment that follows ghosting. First, there’s disbelief. “Did that really just happen?” You check your messages to make sure you didn’t miss something. Then comes frustration. “How could they just drop out of my life without a word?” And finally, anger. Righteous, furious, I-want-to-throw-my-phone anger.

But what makes ghosting so especially brutal is the lack of closure. It’s like finishing a novel with the last chapter ripped out. How do you move on when you don’t even know what went wrong? If only there were a way to make peace with the unknown—because guess what? That’s often the only closure we’re going to get.

How to Handle Ghosting 

Alright, let’s get to the good part: how do you handle ghosting like a boss? Because there are plenty of fish in the sea, and we’re not about to let one cowardly minnow ruin our whole ocean of possibilities.

1. Don’t Blame Yourself

This is so important it should be printed on every dating app: it’s not you, it’s them. Remind yourself of this every time your mind starts dissecting the “why.” The person who ghosted you took the easy way out; it’s a reflection of their maturity, not your worth.

2. Resist the Urge to Reach Out

I know it’s tempting to fire off a message that’s half question, half rant, and 100% "closure-seeking." But the truth is, chasing after answers is likely to hurt you more. If they didn’t respect you enough to give you an explanation before ghosting, chances are, they’re not going to have any magical words of wisdom after the fact.

3. Focus on Moving Forward

Don’t let someone’s ghosting keep you stuck in emotional limbo. Pour your energy back into things that make you feel happy and valued, whether it’s friends, hobbies, or binging a new series that’s too good to put down. The right people will stick around—and trust me, they won’t be ones who vanish when things get real.

4. Remind Yourself: Ghosting Is a Them Problem

Ghosting is their issue, not yours. If someone chooses to disappear rather than communicate, they’re showing you how they handle discomfort. And that, my friend, is all the information you need.

5. Have a Laugh About It

Honestly, sometimes you just have to laugh. Because if there’s one thing we can count on in modern dating, it’s that ghosting isn’t going away anytime soon. So vent to your friends, share a few relatable memes, and let yourself feel the absurdity of it all.

Final Thoughts: Don’t Let the Ghosts Haunt You

Here’s the tea: ghosting is annoying, yes. It’s rude, immature, and disappointing. But it’s not the end of the world, and it’s definitely not the end of your dating life. Take it as a lesson in spotting who’s worth your time. Because if someone can’t even handle a simple “Hey, it was great, but this isn’t for me,” they’re not going to handle the complexities of a real relationship.

At the end of the day, ghosting isn’t about you; it’s about them. So next time someone disappears, don’t let it rattle your confidence. Hold your head high, remind yourself that you’re a gem, and keep shining for the ones who won’t ghost out of your life.

Stay fabulous, and may the only ghosts in your life be the ones haunting your house on Halloween!

Thankful for your presence, Neja