Why Being a Single Woman by Choice Is the Ultimate Privilege

For centuries, women were taught that finding a husband was one of the most important accomplishments of their lives, that marriage was the ultimate destination, and that their happiness, security, and social status depended on whether a man considered them worthy of becoming his wife. Little girls grew up surrounded by fairy tales about princes rescuing princesses, romantic movies in which finding love was the ultimate happy ending, and a society that constantly reminded women that no matter how intelligent, independent, successful, or interesting they became, something would always be missing from their lives unless they had a man standing beside them.

Fortunately, more women are beginning to question this narrative, and I find it absolutely fascinating that something women were once taught to fear, being single, is increasingly becoming something they are consciously choosing for themselves. I genuinely believe that being a single woman by choice is one of the greatest privileges a woman can experience, especially when we consider how many generations of women never had the opportunity to make that decision.

Before anyone misunderstands me, I am not suggesting that being in a relationship is inherently undesirable or that women cannot experience genuine happiness with a romantic partner. I believe in love, affection, emotional intimacy, and the beautiful connection two people can develop when they genuinely respect and appreciate each other. However, I also believe that romantic relationships should enrich our lives rather than become something we pursue out of desperation, social pressure, financial necessity, or the deeply ingrained belief that being chosen by a man somehow determines our value as women.

The ability to look at your life, recognize that you are perfectly capable of creating a meaningful and fulfilling existence without a romantic partner, and consciously decide that you would rather remain single than compromise your happiness is an extraordinary form of freedom. It is also a freedom that women have fought incredibly hard to achieve.

Being Single by Choice Is a Freedom Our Female Ancestors Could Only Dream Of

Whenever I think about the privileges women enjoy today, I find myself thinking about how different our lives would have been just a few generations ago, when marriage was often less about romantic love and more about economic survival, social acceptance, and fulfilling the expectations imposed on women from the moment they were born.

For much of history, women in many societies had limited opportunities to earn their own money, own or control property, pursue higher education, or make independent decisions about their futures, which meant that marriage was frequently treated as a necessity rather than a personal choice.

A woman could be intelligent, ambitious, creative, and perfectly capable of making decisions for herself, yet her opportunities were restricted simply because she was female, while her financial security and social standing were often tied to her father or husband. Imagine having to marry someone because you had no realistic way to support yourself, remaining in an unhappy relationship because divorce carried enormous financial and social consequences, or being expected to devote your entire adult life to serving a husband and raising children regardless of whether those were things you actually wanted.

For countless women, this was not a hypothetical situation but the reality of their everyday lives. Even today, millions of women around the world face legal, economic, cultural, and religious restrictions that make genuine independence extremely difficult, which is why I think we should never take the ability to choose our own relationship status for granted.

Being able to say that you do not want a husband, do not want children, or simply do not want a romantic relationship is a privilege that generations of women fought to make possible.

Of course, having the legal right to remain single does not automatically mean that every woman has the financial resources, personal safety, housing security, or supportive environment necessary to exercise that choice comfortably. Economic independence remains an important part of women's liberation, and we should acknowledge that women experiencing poverty, discrimination, disability-related barriers, or other forms of inequality may face very different circumstances.

Still, the fact that women can increasingly imagine adulthood without automatically placing marriage at the center of their existence represents an enormous cultural shift. I find it empowering that women are no longer universally expected to organize their entire lives around the possibility of becoming someone's wife. We can build our own lives first.

Women Are Discovering That Being Single Can Actually Make Them Happier

One of the most interesting developments surrounding modern singlehood is that researchers are beginning to challenge the assumption that people without romantic partners must be less satisfied with their lives. A study by researchers Elaine Hoan and Geoff MacDonald, published in Social Psychological and Personality Science, examined the experiences of 5,941 single adults and found that single women, on average, reported greater satisfaction with their relationship status, higher overall life satisfaction, greater sexual satisfaction, and less desire for a romantic partner than single men.

I find these findings interesting because society has spent generations portraying single women as lonely, undesirable, and secretly desperate to find husbands, while single men have often been celebrated as independent bachelors enjoying their freedom. The research does not establish that being single automatically makes women happier, nor does it mean that every single woman is more fulfilled than every woman in a relationship, but it certainly challenges the stereotypes we have been encouraged to accept without questioning them.

Perhaps women are increasingly recognizing that being in a relationship is not automatically better than being alone, especially when that relationship requires them to sacrifice their emotional well-being, personal freedom, or sense of identity. Another fascinating contribution comes from social psychologist Bella DePaulo, who has spent decades researching singlehood and challenging the idea that marriage should be considered the ultimate measure of adult success.

In her book Single at Heart, DePaulo explores the experiences of people who find single life deeply authentic and fulfilling, not because they have failed to find someone who wants them, but because living without a romantic partner genuinely suits their personalities, preferences, and understanding of happiness. I love this perspective because it encourages us to stop treating singlehood as an unfortunate waiting period between relationships.

For some women, being single is not a temporary situation they are desperately trying to escape. It is the life they actually want. Research has also identified different experiences of singlehood, including people who are content without dating and people who enjoy their independence while remaining open to romantic possibilities, suggesting that personal choice and the ability to live according to one's preferences are important aspects of well-being.

I think we should be asking women whether they are happy with their lives rather than automatically assuming that their relationship status provides the answer.

The Freedom to Make Decisions Without Having to Consider a Romantic Partner

One of the most appealing aspects of choosing to remain single is the freedom to make decisions based on your own needs, values, and preferences without constantly having to negotiate them with another person. Your home can reflect your personality, your daily routine can accommodate your natural rhythms, and your plans for the future can develop according to what genuinely interests you rather than what would be most convenient for a romantic partner.

You do not have to consider whether someone else would approve of your career decisions, whether relocating would interfere with their ambitions, or whether the way you prefer to spend your free time is compatible with their expectations. Of course, healthy relationships should allow both people to maintain their individuality, and making compromises is a perfectly normal part of sharing your life with someone you love.

However, even the healthiest romantic relationship involves considering another person's needs, preferences, and circumstances, which inevitably introduces responsibilities that single women do not have in the same way.

For a woman who genuinely enjoys independence, that freedom can be incredibly valuable. I also think we underestimate how wonderful it can be to develop a strong relationship with ourselves, particularly when we have spent so much of our lives being encouraged to prioritize how other people perceive us.

Learning what makes you happy without constantly seeking approval, discovering which activities genuinely interest you, and becoming comfortable with your own company can transform the way you experience everyday life. A peaceful evening at home does not become less meaningful simply because you are spending it without a romantic partner. Your accomplishments do not become less impressive because you do not have a husband celebrating them.

Your life does not become less valuable because it looks different from the traditional expectations society has created for women. Being the person who makes the decisions about your own life is a privilege, and women should never feel guilty for enjoying it.

Freedom From the Emotional Labor Women Are Often Expected to Perform

Another reason I believe choosing to remain single can be incredibly liberating is that heterosexual relationships still frequently involve unequal expectations surrounding emotional labor, domestic responsibilities, and caregiving.

Despite the progress women have made in education, employment, and financial independence, many continue to experience relationships in which they are expected to manage the household, remember important appointments, maintain family relationships, anticipate emotional needs, and take responsibility for countless invisible tasks that keep everyday life functioning. A woman may work just as many hours as her partner, contribute financially to their household, and pursue her own ambitions, yet still find herself responsible for organizing much of their shared existence.

The problem is not that relationships require effort, because every meaningful relationship does, but that women have historically been expected to provide a disproportionate amount of that effort while treating it as a natural extension of femininity. I find it frustrating when women are praised for being endlessly understanding, patient, forgiving, and accommodating, while men are celebrated for performing basic responsibilities that should never have been considered extraordinary in the first place.

A man who participates in household chores is not doing his female partner a favor. A man who remembers important information about his own family is not demonstrating some remarkable talent. A man who communicates respectfully, takes responsibility for his behavior, and contributes to the emotional health of his relationship is simply behaving like a responsible adult. Unfortunately, many women have been conditioned to accept considerably less.

Choosing to remain single can mean refusing to participate in a relationship where you are expected to become someone's unpaid personal assistant, therapist, household manager, or substitute mother. It can mean recognizing that your emotional energy is valuable and that you would rather invest it in yourself than continuously explain to another adult why mutual respect, consideration, and responsibility are necessary.

I want to emphasize that loving, emotionally mature men exist, and relationships based on genuine equality can be wonderful. However, being single is infinitely preferable to being in a relationship where you are responsible for maintaining another person's comfort at the expense of your own well-being. Women deserve partners, not additional responsibilities.

The Privilege of No Longer Seeking Male Validation

One of the most damaging messages girls receive while growing up is that being desirable to men is somehow connected to their worth as human beings. From a ridiculously young age, girls are encouraged to think about whether boys find them attractive, whether their bodies meet conventional beauty standards, and whether their personalities make them appealing romantic partners.

As women become older, the pressure evolves, but the underlying message often remains the same, suggesting that being wanted by a man is something we should consider an accomplishment. I find this incredibly problematic because it encourages women to evaluate themselves through the eyes of men rather than developing their own understanding of who they are and what makes their lives meaningful.

A woman's intelligence, compassion, creativity, accomplishments, and character do not become more valuable because a man finds her attractive. Being beautiful does not create an obligation to pursue romantic attention, and being desired does not mean someone genuinely respects or appreciates you.

Unfortunately, the desire for male validation can become so deeply ingrained that women find themselves pursuing relationships with men they do not particularly admire, simply because being chosen temporarily reassures them that they are attractive or worthy of love. I think one of the most liberating experiences a woman can have is reaching a point where she no longer feels compelled to prove her desirability.

She can enjoy fashion because she loves expressing herself through clothing, wear makeup because she appreciates beauty, and take care of her appearance because these things make her feel good rather than because she is hoping to attract someone's attention. She can recognize an attractive man without automatically wondering whether he finds her attractive in return.

She can encounter rejection without interpreting it as evidence that something is wrong with her. Most importantly, she can understand that being wanted and being valued are not necessarily the same thing. The growing interest in stepping away from dating culture reflects this desire to reclaim personal identity. An ABC News article about women choosing singlehood explored the experiences of women who had become exhausted by the constant pursuit of romantic attention, including the boysober movement, which encourages women to temporarily step away from dating and examine their relationship with male validation

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I think this is a fascinating development because it challenges the assumption that women should always be romantically available, actively searching, or concerned about whether they are desirable. A woman who does not need male approval to feel valuable is much harder to manipulate through the promise of romantic attention. That is an incredibly powerful position to be in.

Being Single Means You Never Have to Settle for Crumbs

One of the saddest things I have observed about romantic relationships is how frequently women are encouraged to accept behavior that leaves them feeling emotionally neglected, unappreciated, or constantly uncertain about where they stand. Women are told to be patient with men who refuse to communicate, make excuses for partners who rarely demonstrate affection, and celebrate the occasional thoughtful gesture as though receiving basic consideration were some extraordinary privilege.

I cannot stand the idea that women should feel grateful for crumbs simply because society has convinced them that having a boyfriend or husband is better than being single. Why should a woman consider herself fortunate to be in a relationship where she constantly has to ask for affection, explain why disrespectful behavior hurts her, or suppress her emotional needs to avoid making her partner uncomfortable?

Why should she be expected to remain loyal to someone who repeatedly disappoints her simply because ending the relationship would mean becoming single again? I believe that love should involve genuine appreciation, mutual consideration, emotional safety, and the willingness to understand another person's perspective. Nobody is perfect, and even healthy relationships require difficult conversations, but there is an enormous difference between working through ordinary disagreements with a loving partner and spending years trying to convince someone to treat you with basic respect.

Research on the fear of being single has found that people who are particularly afraid of remaining unpartnered may be more willing to settle for less satisfying relationships, which suggests that becoming comfortable with singlehood can also help people make healthier romantic decisions. This is one reason I believe women benefit enormously from knowing that being single is a perfectly acceptable alternative.

When you genuinely understand that you can have a fulfilling life without a romantic partner, you become less likely to tolerate mistreatment simply because you are frightened of losing your relationship. You no longer have to approach dating as though finding someone willing to commit to you is the ultimate prize. Instead, you can ask whether that person actually deserves a place in the life you have created. A relationship should be worth giving up some of your independence for, not something you maintain because you are afraid of being alone.

The Peace of Not Having to Deal With Unnecessary Relationship Drama

I think peace is one of the most underrated luxuries in modern life, particularly when we consider how much emotional exhaustion people experience through unhealthy romantic relationships. Imagine coming home after a difficult day and knowing that you will not have to deal with a partner's unpredictable moods, unnecessary arguments, jealousy, dishonesty, or refusal to take responsibility for their behavior.

Imagine not having to wonder whether someone is hiding something from you, whether they are genuinely committed to your relationship, or whether another uncomfortable conversation will turn into an exhausting conflict. For women who have experienced controlling, manipulative, or emotionally immature partners, the absence of relationship drama can feel like an extraordinary relief.

Of course, singlehood does not eliminate stress, anxiety, financial concerns, family problems, or the ordinary difficulties of being human, and I would never suggest that women without romantic partners automatically enjoy peaceful lives. However, choosing to remain single can eliminate an entire category of potential relationship-related stress, particularly when the alternative involves a partner who consistently creates more problems than happiness.

I also believe that society has romanticized emotional turbulence to an unhealthy degree. We are constantly exposed to fictional relationships in which jealousy is presented as passion, possessiveness is mistaken for devotion, and dramatic reconciliations are portrayed as evidence of extraordinary love. Personally, I find the idea that love should involve constant emotional instability deeply unappealing.

Real affection should not require someone to live in a permanent state of uncertainty. A healthy relationship can provide tremendous comfort and security, but an unhealthy one can become a significant source of psychological distress. For women who prefer their independence, choosing singlehood can be a conscious decision to protect the emotional stability they have worked hard to establish. Peace is not boring, and a woman does not need romantic drama to make her life interesting.

Single Women Can Invest More Energy in Their Own Personal Growth

Another aspect of singlehood that I find appealing is the opportunity to dedicate more time and attention to personal development. Romantic relationships can certainly encourage growth when both partners support each other's ambitions, but maintaining a relationship also requires time and emotional energy that could otherwise be invested in individual interests. A woman who chooses to remain single may have more flexibility to pursue an education, develop professional skills, explore creative interests, improve her physical health, or simply spend time understanding herself.

I think this becomes important when we consider how many women have been socialized to prioritize romantic relationships above their personal ambitions. How many women have abandoned opportunities because their partners did not support them? How many have gradually stopped pursuing their interests because they became responsible for accommodating someone else's lifestyle? How many have spent years focusing on helping their partners achieve their dreams while neglecting their own?

I find it heartbreaking when a woman becomes so consumed by a romantic relationship that she gradually loses touch with the person she was before entering it. A healthy relationship should never require someone to abandon their identity, but singlehood offers a particularly direct opportunity to explore life without having to coordinate personal growth with a romantic partner.

Research into singlehood increasingly recognizes that people can experience meaningful personal development while living without a partner, particularly when they view their relationship status as compatible with their values rather than as evidence of something missing from their lives. I also appreciate the work of social psychologist Bella DePaulo, whose research challenges the assumption that romantic relationships should occupy the center of everyone's emotional and social existence.

In a 2024 University of California, Santa Barbara article, DePaulo discussed people who are single at heart, meaning that singlehood is not merely something they tolerate but a way of life that feels particularly authentic and fulfilling. I think women deserve the opportunity to discover whether this describes them without being made to feel that their preferences are abnormal. Personal growth should not be viewed as something women pursue only until they find a romantic partner. It should remain an important part of their lives regardless of their relationship status.

Choosing Singlehood Can Also Mean Rejecting Traditional Gender Roles

From a feminist perspective, I find the increasing acceptance of voluntary singlehood especially significant because it challenges one of the oldest expectations imposed on women. For generations, women were encouraged to understand themselves primarily through their relationships with other people, particularly as wives and mothers. Their accomplishments were frequently measured by how successfully they fulfilled these roles, while their individual ambitions were treated as secondary or even selfish. Although society has changed considerably, traces of these expectations remain deeply embedded in contemporary culture.

Women are still asked why they are unmarried, whether they are worried about becoming too old to find a partner, and whether they will eventually regret prioritizing independence over traditional family life. A woman who expresses little interest in marriage may be accused of being selfish, emotionally damaged, excessively demanding, or incapable of maintaining a relationship.

I find it interesting that women who choose not to pursue romantic relationships are so frequently expected to justify themselves, while women who want husbands are rarely required to provide elaborate explanations for their preferences. Why should wanting marriage be considered natural while not wanting it requires psychological investigation? Why do people assume that a woman who chooses to remain single must secretly be disappointed, bitter, or afraid of intimacy?

Perhaps she simply enjoys her life. Perhaps she understands her personality well enough to recognize that a traditional romantic partnership would not make her happier. Perhaps she has experienced relationships and concluded that the compromises involved are not particularly appealing to her. None of these possibilities should be considered controversial.

A fascinating 2024 study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, titled The Feminization of Freedom, explored the experiences of 40 voluntarily childfree, never-married women of color between the ages of 36 and 61.

Researcher Kimberly Martinez Phillips examined how these women understood love, freedom, and personal fulfillment outside traditional expectations surrounding marriage and motherhood, while also acknowledging the particular social inequalities they experienced. I find this research valuable because feminism should never be limited to celebrating women who successfully combine marriage, motherhood, and professional accomplishments.

It should also celebrate women who reject those traditional roles entirely. Feminism means supporting women's freedom to choose their own lives, even when those choices do not resemble what society considers conventional femininity. A woman does not owe society a husband. She does not owe anyone children. She does not need to prove that she is capable of being loved by entering a romantic relationship. Her existence is already meaningful.

Being Single Does Not Mean Being Lonely or Living Without Love

One of the misconceptions surrounding single women is the assumption that romantic relationships are the only meaningful source of love, affection, companionship, and emotional intimacy. I find this perspective incredibly narrow because human relationships are far more diverse than society's obsession with romantic partnerships would suggest. A woman can experience profound emotional connections through friendships, family relationships, and the communities she chooses to become part of, while also developing a meaningful relationship with herself.

She can feel deeply appreciated by the people around her without having a romantic partner, and she can create a life filled with emotional warmth without organizing her entire social existence around one person. Of course, single women can experience loneliness, just as married women and women in relationships can. Being in a relationship does not guarantee that someone feels understood, appreciated, or emotionally connected.

In fact, I would argue that feeling lonely while sitting beside someone who is supposed to love you can be particularly painful because the relationship creates an expectation of emotional closeness that is not being fulfilled. I also think we should stop confusing solitude with loneliness. Solitude can be a conscious preference, an opportunity to enjoy your own company and experience the freedom of not having to interact with others constantly. Loneliness, on the other hand, involves feeling that your need for meaningful connection is not being met.

A woman who enjoys spending time alone is not necessarily lonely, and a woman who prefers a relatively quiet social life should not be treated as though she needs to become more outgoing to be psychologically healthy. Some people genuinely thrive with considerable personal space, while others prefer more frequent social interaction. Neither preference makes someone more valuable or emotionally mature. An important part of accepting singlehood is recognizing that love does not belong exclusively to romantic couples. A life without a romantic relationship is not automatically a life without love.

Women No Longer Have to Treat Marriage as an Achievement

I have always found it strange that society continues to celebrate marriage as though becoming someone's wife were automatically evidence of personal success. Marriage can be a beautiful commitment when two people genuinely love each other and want to build a shared future, but the act of getting married does not establish that someone is intelligent, emotionally mature, compassionate, or successful.

A woman can marry someone who treats her terribly, just as she can remain single while building an extraordinary life filled with meaningful accomplishments. Yet society often responds to these women very differently. The married woman may receive congratulations simply because she has achieved a conventional milestone, while the single woman may be questioned about why she has not found someone. I think we should reconsider what we celebrate.

Why should getting engaged automatically be treated as a greater accomplishment than becoming financially independent, completing an education, creating something meaningful, or overcoming personal difficulties? Why should a wedding ring carry more social significance than a woman's character or contributions to the world?

I am not suggesting that we should stop celebrating happy relationships, but I would love to see a world where women receive just as much encouragement for building fulfilling lives outside marriage. I also dislike the implication that a woman's relationship status determines whether she has successfully entered adulthood. Being single at 25, 40, 60, or 80 should not automatically invite pity.

A woman who has never married is not necessarily someone who missed an important opportunity. She may be someone who made a deliberate decision about how she wanted to live. The growing cultural conversation reflects this shift. Publications including Oprah Daily, Good Housekeeping, and British Vogue have explored women's increasing willingness to embrace singlehood as a fulfilling lifestyle rather than an unfortunate circumstance.

I find it encouraging that these conversations are becoming more visible because younger generations of women deserve to grow up understanding that marriage is an option rather than an obligation.

Choosing to Be Single Does Not Mean Hating Men

Whenever women discuss the benefits of independence or express frustration with traditional relationship expectations, someone inevitably interprets the conversation as evidence that feminism encourages women to hate men. I find this reaction both predictable and frustrating. A woman can appreciate men, enjoy their company, respect them as human beings, and still have absolutely no desire to enter a romantic relationship with one. Choosing to remain single does not mean believing that every man is abusive, emotionally immature, selfish, or incapable of being a loving partner.

It simply means recognizing that having a romantic relationship is not a requirement for personal happiness. I also think we should acknowledge that women are perfectly entitled to criticize harmful male behavior without being accused of hating an entire gender. Recognizing misogyny, unequal domestic responsibilities, emotional manipulation, or the normalization of disrespectful behavior is not an attack on men who genuinely believe in equality. In fact, men who respect women should have no reason to feel threatened by women becoming more independent.

A man who believes women deserve equal rights should support their freedom to remain single just as much as their freedom to pursue relationships. What I find revealing is how uncomfortable some people become when women stop treating male attention as something they desperately need. For centuries, women's financial security and social acceptance were often connected to their relationships with men, which created an enormous imbalance of power. As women gain greater independence, romantic relationships increasingly have to justify themselves through the actual happiness and fulfillment they provide.

I consider that a positive development for everyone. Men should want women to choose relationships because they genuinely love their partners, not because they lack the resources or confidence to live independently. A woman who chooses to remain single is not rejecting men as human beings. She is exercising her right to decide what kind of life makes her happy.

The Privilege Is Having a Genuine Choice

Although I strongly believe in the benefits of voluntary singlehood, I also think it is important to acknowledge that choosing to remain single is not automatically the best decision for every woman. Some women genuinely love being in romantic relationships, enjoy sharing their everyday lives with a partner, and find enormous fulfillment in marriage. Others feel happiest living independently and have little interest in romantic commitment. Many women fall somewhere between these preferences, enjoying singlehood while remaining open to meeting someone who genuinely complements their lives.

Our personalities, emotional needs, circumstances, and preferences are different, which means there is no universal relationship arrangement that guarantees happiness. I would never want women to feel pressured to remain single simply because independence has become fashionable, just as I would never want them to feel pressured to marry because society considers marriage desirable. Replacing one restrictive expectation with another would completely defeat the purpose of women's liberation.

The real privilege is having enough freedom, security, and self-awareness to make a decision that reflects your own needs rather than someone else's expectations. I also think it is important to remember that singlehood is not necessarily effortless. Living alone can be expensive, managing responsibilities without a partner can become exhausting, and social systems frequently provide financial or practical advantages to married couples. Single women may also encounter discrimination, intrusive questions, or the assumption that their lives are less meaningful because they do not have romantic partners.

For women who genuinely want relationships but struggle to find compatible partners, being single can be painful rather than liberating. Acknowledging these realities does not diminish the benefits of choosing singlehood. It simply reminds us that freedom exists within social and economic circumstances that are not equally favorable to everyone.

I believe the ultimate goal should be a society where women can pursue fulfilling romantic relationships without sacrificing their independence and where women who prefer to remain single are treated with equal respect. Nobody should have to defend their happiness simply because it does not resemble someone else's.

Why I Believe Being Single by Choice Is One of the Greatest Privileges a Woman Can Have

The older I become, the more I appreciate the importance of personal freedom, emotional maturity, and building a life that reflects our individual values. I believe romantic love can be wonderful, but I refuse to accept the idea that women should organize their entire existence around finding it. I find it deeply empowering that more women are questioning the expectations they inherited and recognizing that they do not have to follow the traditional path of dating, marriage, and motherhood simply because previous generations were expected to do so.

For women who genuinely prefer singlehood, the ability to remain independent without feeling incomplete is an extraordinary achievement, particularly when we remember how recently many women gained meaningful control over their own financial and personal decisions. I also think women who are happily partnered can learn something valuable from women who choose to remain single.

We should all strive to maintain our individuality, develop financial independence whenever possible, establish healthy boundaries, and recognize that our value does not depend on whether someone wants to spend their life with us. Being in love should never mean abandoning ourselves.

A romantic partner should be someone we choose because their presence genuinely enriches our lives, not someone we cling to because we have been conditioned to fear the alternative. I would love to see more women grow up understanding that they are complete human beings long before anyone falls in love with them. Their dreams deserve attention even when those dreams have nothing to do with marriage. Their happiness deserves consideration even when achieving it requires disappointing people who expect them to live differently. Their freedom deserves protection even when exercising it means rejecting traditions that have existed for generations.

Most importantly, I want women to understand that they do not have to earn the right to live independently by proving that they have tried hard enough to find a romantic partner. They can simply choose themselves. The ultimate privilege is not being single because nobody wants you, or being in a relationship because somebody finally chose you. It is having the freedom to decide that your life belongs to you, and that romantic love is welcome only if it genuinely makes that life better.

For centuries, women were expected to consider being chosen by a man one of the greatest accomplishments of their lives. I think one of the most beautiful developments of modern feminism is that women are increasingly recognizing the value of choosing themselves. Whether that means remaining single for a few years, embracing lifelong singlehood, or eventually entering a loving and equal relationship, the decision should belong to the woman whose life is being shaped by it.

Being a woman should never mean being required to become someone's wife to experience a meaningful, successful, and fulfilling life.

Thankful for your presence, Neja